Me in My Dissertation

I find this assignment difficult because it is an intimate topic for me: One that can expose me and make me vulnerable to criticism...or being laughed at. It comes down to what we read last week about not wanting to talk about my topic just yet. But, I'll give it a try because I'm hoping writing about it will help keep me excited and moving in the right direction.

I continue to struggle with a clear direction for my dissertation. I have the 'Big Picture' of working with people in trauma but the specifics are fuzzy. The ME in the process is the easy part. On September 20, 2001 I deployed with my husband, Jim, to New York City with Samaritan's Purse to offer spiritual support to the city and assist in the opening of the Billy Graham Prayer Call Center. It was unchartered territory for Samaritan's Purse. Prior to 9-11, Samaritan’s Purse ministry had been in International relief of shelter, food, and clothing. For 9-11 they chose to work domestically and add Christian counseling to their ministry services for the first time ever. Jim and I were in the 2nd crew to deploy. There was no precedent, no protocol, and no mentors. We were told “Go Help” and New York City was our targeted audience. The following 10 days changed my life. I learned to approach total strangers, ask to hear their stories, and offer them emotional and spiritual support. I learned to give my heart to those strangers and to weave their stories into my life. The stories teach me how to help the next person in need.

Following 9-11, I’ve gotten hundreds of hours of training in crisis/trauma response. I’ve worked extensively with BCPS to formalize our school ASSIST Team. I’ve trained 100 Billy Graham Rapid Response Team members from across the nation. I’ve trained law enforcement, schools, fire and emergency management personnel from 10 different states. I’ve presented at 3 state, 1 national, and 1 international conference on crisis intervention. I have continued to deploy. I spent another 2 weeks in New York City. I spent a total of 3 weeks in Louisiana following Katrina. I have spent the past 2 years offering support to individuals with life threatening cancer. I offer voluntary services locally to first responders and schools who need assistance following a critical incident.

I deploy, teach, and present because I have a passion to help those in crisis. I believe that it is a sacred honor to work with these individuals because they are emotionally vulnerable and exposed. The everyday masks have been removed and it is like I can see straight into their souls.

The heart of crisis intervention is relationships. The heart of relationships is connectedness. The heart of connectedness is love. I want to write a reflective, narrative dissertation on the power of love as it impacts individuals in crisis.